I've been feeling something strange these days. I don't know why I don't know how. Some things I want in life, the one I always dream of, it's surely under my thumbs, it's supposed to make me feel happy, but why am I feeling sad.... and numb? The feeling when you can't really trust where life will take you. The feeling knowing that something wouldn't last forever. I've been feeling something strange these days. I don't know why I don't know how. Some things I want in life, the one I always dream of, it's surely under my thumbs, it's supposed to make me feel happy, but why am I feeling sad.... and numb? The feeling when you can't really trust where life will take you. The feeling knowing that something wouldn't last forever.
Doubting. that always be my problem. When I'm doubting something, I, unconsciously hurting the others, friends, partner, parent. Me somehow make them feel unworthy or cannot be trusted. Even though I don't mean it that way. I have trust issues, and it went worse for the past 2 years, I don't know how to fix it. It's actually getting better, thanks to Him. But it's still there.. no matter how they perceive me to trust them, I can't do it fully. I appreciate their presence in my life, I can't be more thankful for it. So I took the chance and giving all my life for them, risking them. I'm scared to be hurt again, but I guess, being hurt is one of the ways to make me stronger so I have to deal with it. I'm trying to trust where life will take me, good or bad. I'm learning to trust people again, to make the one that I love happy and feel appreciated. I'm not going to waste my time, and I will show that I am on the right path right now.
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AuthorInternational Relations' graduates, Diplomat in the making, Korean things enthusiast. Archives
October 2020
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